Santa Ain't Comin' No Mo'!
by Raiden X
Summary: Shinji gets in trouble with another anthropomorphic personification, and this time it's the jolly 'Fat guy' in red... (This songfic is a sidestory to "Shinji's Odd Jobs", a 'must read' for those who likes the series)


This is a fanfic, 'nuf said

This is a fanfic, 'nuf said.

I don't own N.G.E. and everything about it. If I did, then I wouldn't be writing fanfics and I'll be up on my ass making another movie and all that mess.

Give your comments at [raiden_x_@hotmail.com][1]

Pre-ramblings: This is a side-songfic for "Shinji's Odd Jobs".

This story is set beyond the current chapters, think of this as a sneak preview.

The I was inspired to make this songfic by the song "Santa Ain't Comin' No Mo'" from the album 'Fruitcake' by the band 'ERASERHEADS' from Philippines. For those who would like the original Mp3 of this song, get more info at the 'Multimedia download' section of my website. Email me before downloading anything.

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Santa Ain't Comin' No Mo'

Another songfic by Raiden_X_

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[Santa's workshop]

"Thanks a lot kid! Now the big 'Red Tub of Lard' has a mid-life crisis!" The chief of the elves yelled angrily at the 'Death-in-training'.

"........!" Shinji was flabbergasted. 

Santa on psychological leave meant that there would be no Christmas gifts. That could bring about a rise upon non-believers, and that meant Shinji would have to harvest Ol' St. Nick's soul.

"We got to warn the villagers! Our existence is in danger!" The Elf chief hollered to his group.

Oh yeah, No Santa meant no Elven workshop and secret North Pole village. Shinji groaned.

"I have announcement!" The oldest of the five pixies hollered over the halls of the workshop. Production was halted as they perked up to listen to their cheif-supervisor.

Elf Chief:

"I'd hate to burst your bubble,  
Rain on your parade,  
Coz you've gone through all the trouble,  
Preparations you have made.  
But I've got a little news and,  
It's really not that good,  
I don't wanna spoil the party,  
But I really think I should..."  


Santa's Little helpers (Chorus):

"You may have been naughty,  
You may have been nice,  
Well it doesn't really matter at all!  
Throw your stockings out of the window,  
Coz Santa ain't comin' no mo'!"  
  
"We talked to him this morning,  
And he said he wasn't well,  
Ole Rudolph has a cold,  
His nose is running like hell.  
He doesn't like the weather,  
And he really hates the press,  
He'd rather stay in bed,  
Than be your little town's guest..."  


Santa's Little helpers (Chorus):

"You may have been naughty,  
You may have been nice,  
Well it doesn't really matter at all!  
Throw your stockings out of the window,  
Coz Santa ain't comin' no mo'!  
Oh no..."  
  
"Don't want no hesitation,  
Now children don't you fret.  
There's no need to feel bad about a fat guy in red.  
We want your full cooperation,  
Everybody settle down,  
It's time to talk business,  
We're not here to fool around..."  


Santa's Little helpers (Chorus):

"You may have been naughty,  
You may have been nice,  
Well it doesn't really matter at all!  
Throw your stockings out of the window,  
Coz Santa ain't comin' no mo'!  
Throw your stockings out of the window,  
Coz Santa ain't comin' no mo'!  
Throw your stockings out of the window,  
Coz Santa ain't comin' no mo'.......... "  


  
All of the little buggers began to cry... 

"*Sob!* All that years of hard *Sniff!* work for nothing!" 

"At least the Ol' slave driver isn't going to make work overtime anymore..." 

"But that means we're no longer needed! We're dead! 

"........" Shinji was at a loss to say. 

"The next Christmas eve is coming next week! What are we going to do?" One of them wailed.   
"We can't even use the sleigh without that freak, Rudolf!"

"........Uh..." Shinji uttered.

All five high-ranking elves glared at the source of their misery. The Third Child suddenly felt smaller than these midgets.

"Since I... um, brought this mess, could I help you with something?"

"Not unless you can locate all the kids' homes all over the world!" The taller Elf snapped at him sharply.

"Well actually, I could." The shrouded boy replied, extracting a random hourglass from the vast void of his cloak.

This surprised the little 900+ year old ji-joes. They huddled together for an impromptu conference.

"Er... Could you handle reindeers?" The chief asked with great hope in his bead like eyes.

"I tried a fire-breathing skeletal-horse before, what could possibly be worse?" Shinji stated nervously.

Ah... but there always was something worse than the worst... and the young Ikari had been on that path a long time ago, and he's still stuck there.

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End of crappy songfic

Author's Jibah-Jaba: 

I hate to burst your bubbles but, This is just a teaser of chapters to come... I'll be writing some more chapters over the weeks...

I'm sorry if there are any grammatical or spelling errors (I'm always on a rush to finish things, you see?), I'm really a flunky when it comes to grammar. I'm not really a writer but I'm the kind of guy that likes to draw. Sometimes you can't draw something but you can do it in writing (only that it's really hard to picture stuff with words), that's why I started writing these pathetic excuses for fun.

Please send any comments or suggestions at [raiden_x_@hotmail.com][1]

I'm a good sport when it comes to bad reviews but sending them to me usually doesn't affect anything, it just most likely add up to the reviews counter.

You can also get weekly updates (I usually update it every Friday/Saturday...) of my plight on fanfiction writing at: [http://raiden-x.tripod.com/raidenxsfanfics/][2] (construction in progress!)

See ya! 

   [1]: mailto:raiden_x_@hotmail.com
   [2]: http://raiden-x.tripod.com/raidenxsfanfics/



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